A Bipartisan Bevy of Bullies
Mrs. Grundy joined the Mythical Moralist Trade Association’s recent visit to Capitol Hill. MMTA members know well the suffering wrought by plagues and epidemics. Thusly, they were most interested to attend former NIH Director Anthony Fauci’s Senate testimony about the COVID-19 pandemic of 2020-2023.
The hearing room was understandably aflutter as MMTA members were escorted to front row seats. Rarely does one see Mrs. Grundy, Yoda, Gandalf and the Dowager Countess of Grantham together. After respectful nods to the roomful of admirers, the Moralists awaited a thoughtful discussion of ethics and science in the world’s greatest deliberative body.
Instead, they witnessed a schoolyard mob and a bipartisan bevy of bullies. Even as the Director has much to answer for, the Senators’ conduct did them no credit, either. They leveled insults across the aisle, accused the Director of disgusting behavior, calling him a narcissist and megalomaniac. It reminded Mrs. Grundy of the adage: The pot called the kettle black.
While others may debate Constitutional rights, the MMTA advocates for virtue in substance and process. In this instance, they found neither. Nor did they find new or useful information. The Dowager Countess, who lost many loved ones to the Spanish Flu, especially regretted this squandered opportunity.
With the timeless wisdom of ages, the Moralists will issue a pronouncement against all self-interest and political grandstanding. They will announce it via royal herald.
Additionally, they deplored the Ohio Senator who punctuated his comments with profanity. Gandalf objected to the syntax, Yoda to the morphology, and Mrs. Grundy to Ohio. The MMTA PAC will retract their support for this Congressional Mullet and also announce this decision via royal herald.
Finally, to emphasize their commitment to vigorous moral leadership, the Moralists adopted Mrs. Grundy’s slogan: Extremism in Defense of Virtue is No Vice. Rest assured, they are undeterred by the increasing vacuum of virtue. They will return to Washington with reinforcements, including no less than the legendary Albus Dumbledore. Indeed.
