Shock and Awe

Mrs. Grundy urges virtue, when the government threatens to livestream an execution.

Mrs. Grundy is not one of those irritating people who says, “I told you so.”

Yet, she did warn that a government which sponsored bare-chested cage fights to celebrate the Presidential Mullet’s birthday was certainly capable of other gruesome adventures (see What’s Next, Gladiator Games at the County Fair?).

Once again, The Miss Grundys are embarrassed by their mother’s outburst.

Thusly, she wonders why anyone is astonished by that same government’s plan to live-stream a public execution. It reminds her of Captain Louis Renault being Shocked! Shocked! there is gambling in Casablanca.

This viewpoint led to a most uncomfortable incident with The Miss Grundys at the Five-County Diner after church. Grateful Readers recall the Diner is a gathering spot for all and sundry, a town square of sorts.

The Grundy women took their table just as Mayor Ashfield stood and – in what Mrs. Grundy hoped was his final bloviation before election day –  stated that even the idea of broadcasting an execution was barbaric. 

Although the Mayor merely confirmed himself as master of the obvious, Mrs. Grundy agreed with him. As “amens” echoed across the tables, she thought her neighbors might want her considered opinion about this significant matter.

So, despite The Miss Grundys pleas to sit down, Mrs. Grundy stood to address her fellow patrons. The room fell silent. She was gratified by the respectful awe, even if her cheeky daughters later told Farmer Grundy they were so embarrassed they wanted to hide. 

Mrs. Grundy told her neighbors they must not watch any such filth! They must overcome their curiosity and base instincts! She had already used parental controls to block violent programming on Grundy televisions; but that was insufficient, now. This was a new threat! She urged them to block all government-sponsored content, even if it meant missing Medicare open enrollment. They must remain unified for virtue!

The Miss Grundys snickered at this, for Mrs. Grundy had removed her strict parental controls the minute she realized her PBS murder mysteries were also blocked. Indeed.